giovedì 29 dicembre 2011

Who And What Is A Serious Guy?!

I do not know?! Am I heart broken, full of hatred or madly in love?! Maybe all of those!
I do not want to fill my blog with Lost Love Crap!( Or Love Found: you never know)
But now I ask myself:
"Who And What Is A Serious Guy?!"

Well there are a lot of Links/Posts on Facebook about how a serious girl is like and how a man should never lose her. I come across one at least once a day! But why aren't there any about how a serious guy should be. Is it to daring to write a sentence or two about what to aspect from a serious guy..?!
I feel confuse as much as men are confusing to me.
The men I know/knew never expressed their feelings or tell you if they love you or not. I might be a control freak but why should I make men believe that they are in control or in charge when the truth is that I AM IN CONTROL and that I MUST BE IN CONTROL TO FEEL CONFORTABLE?!

I found Post today that said: " A real man is one that loves only one woman in a million ways!" I do belive that it might be true,
Alicia Keys in Womans Worth says:
A real man knows a real woman when he sees her
And a real woman knows a real man ain't afraid to please her
And a real woman knows a real man always comes first
And a real man just can't deny a woman's worth


I've more than once tryied to make my man understand what I want but, as usual, I found that males have serious problems and lack of listening and understanding skill.

I hope that after 4 months from a break up, that completely shattered my poor heart, I learned something which is:
Men are made to lie and they can't be trusted!

Xoxo
OnlyChick

martedì 27 dicembre 2011

To Be Or Not To Be?!


To Be Or Not To Be.. That Is The Question!
I cant really be honest about why those words keep swirling in my mind (at least for now because if I did it will be like realizing that everything I've belived one is untrue) but Hamlet is one of my favourite plays/book ever..
The only problem I have with this play is the main character Prince Hamlet. It may sound like a contradiction ( just to puntualize: it is!) but I never liked Hamlet because he's a man that talks way to much. But "there's no Hamlet without the Prince"!
My sister S. once told me that we should bust the myth that men talk less then women because she strongly believe is not true and I still don't know how she does it, but she's always capable of proving herself right ( if you are reading Man With A Man Bag!).

The question that I am asking myself is:
"Is better a man that says too little or one that says too much?"
Up until now I still haven't met a men capable of saying the right amout of words in any case scenario. In past few weeks of I've been realizing that men have a terrible sense of expressing themselves and today I had proves to my suspiciouns.
Is that a bad thing?! Of course, I find hard to understand what they want, when they want it or why..
This consideration brought me a step closer to understanding something about myself:
I am closer to Hamlet then I ever though.. Why?
Because I speek daggers to men as he does to women, I feel betrayed by their false love ( That makes us fools) and I have a strong sterotype of men in my mind. But Most Importantly I'm Nuts in my Antic Disposition of Hatred toward Men..
Xoxo
OnlyChick

lunedì 26 dicembre 2011

Trying To Talk With A Man?!

Trying To Talk With A Man by Adrianne Rich
The poem describes a conversation between a man and a woman who have gone out into the desert where bombs are being tested. As the title indicates, this conversation is difficult: The speaker is “trying” to talk and perhaps not succeeding. Each of the two people in the poem, a man and a woman, sees the other as dangerously threatening; after communication has broken down.

I still don't know why I'm trying so hard to understand mankind...
Man and Women I suppouse!
People seems no to understand the different between right and wrong, true and false.
I might be one of the unusual people on this world, but I usually do not listen to only one side of a story, as I try as hard as I can not to get in confrontations with others (even though so far my method is proved to be extremely unsuccessful!)
Some people seem not being able to let go or look with their eyes and take position in what they believe or they think is just right.
I must puntualize the fact that I AM NOT PERFECT (!) instead I'm full of defaults! But at least I'm honest about it!
I'm so sick of the unfair.. and of  people that do not see what they might be loosing (or might already have lost) and frustrate other people with their negative egoistic views!
I've been told more then once what they think I am! And well buddy, let ME tell YOU something.. ALL THE THINGS YOU THINK I AM.. YOU ARE! And the problem you may see in me.. is being you.. and I am not you and I WILL NEVER BE!

Adrianne Rich Poem Title always inspired me.I don't know if is because my interaction skills are degenerating expecially with the XY sex chromosomes or because I feel that I'm not capable to get my message across anymore, forcing the words of failure, that are impartured harsly on me, in my brain and straining my soul into a dark filty room..impossible to be opened....

Xoxo
OnlyChick

Daring!

Once someone said:


 Those who dare to fail miserably can achieve greatly.

~ John F. Kennedy

It's been almost a YEAR since the last time I posted something.

A friend of mine, A., told me that 2012 was going to be a good year due to the presence of many two 2s that mean that is the year of the second chances. I liked the idea.. even though it dipends on which sector the second chances are. Every year I usully make some amends or aims to achieve during the years. But this year I decided not to. And to be honest IT BACKFIRED IN MY ASS BIG TIME!!!

It been a long time coming but I realised I made one step foward and three steps back this year. It been really had for me..
First I had to come to terms with a relationship that badly ended after 3 years, to follow living high schoola and started collage and last but not least I ended up in another relationship that even though has diffrent words I keep earing the same song.

I thought about J.F.K. sentence for a long time and everytime I could find a diffrent meaning to it. I took a lot of chances this year but I do not regret any of them.


Xoxo
OnlyChick

domenica 25 dicembre 2011

One Step Foward?!

Most times I ask myself: WHO AM I..?

And during this time of the year the question becomes even louder!
The last few days of Holiday season showed me how everything can go so BADLY wrong!
Two years ago I would have said that I was the happiest girl/women in the world..
Last year I could see my future as clear as sparkling water and fresh as a spring pool..
The only thing I could not see was how much those things were FRAGILE!
I past the last few months trying to be a better person, but I think that all my efferts were just USELESS!
The ONLY thing I ended up with were more hurt and hard feelings toward the people, that everyone thinks, should love me the most.
This year I would say that I do not know were my future is going.. nor with whom and neither where, but most importantely I hope to find it fast enough to be able to find my dream and follow it wherever it will take me.
I've been usually threaten by people warning me that I was going to fall by following my head and my dreams and I would fall and be on my own not able to stand up.
And after all I do have an answer for all you people..
I'M NOT YOUR DOLL AND I WILL BE PROUD OF MYSELF IF I WILL FALL..
BECAUSE I WILL KNOW THAT I FOLLOWED MY MIND!

XOXO
OnlyChick

venerdì 23 dicembre 2011

Ciao!

Ciao!
My Name in BebyTosin... or better say.. this is my nickname
I really can't tell you why I set up this page..
Maybe because I'm in a periode in which I'm trying to figure out who am I.
Or what is my place in this World.
Or I am trying to Live..
Live My Dream Instead Of Living Someone Elses!